After 3 months together for the D-school lecture phase, Thanksgiving break is the little sample of what it will be like to be apart. Usually we end up in little groups – some going to see their families and others tagging along for the fun of it. After a week we return to Idaho refreshed, re-energized, and ready to go to India.
For break this year, I’m excited to not go anywhere, just stay home and do nothing…or at least try to be as lazy as possible.
But this break is harder than in past years, because though most everyone is coming back, it’ll only be for a few days, then they’ll leave for India, and I’ll still be here. Of course then I’m leaving too – to go visit family, do a school in Costa Rica, and then an outreach in India. I won’t be back till September. That’s so far way.
So today I said “bye” to 3 of my friends. 1 who did lecture phase, but isn’t coming back for outreach. The other 2 are going to Utah to staff the D-school there, so I will probably see them again…in October.
Still my heart is heavy thinking of the more good-byes to come as the team leaves for India in just 2 weeks. I’ve known all along that I’m not going with them. I am confident that I’m doing what the Father wants me to do. I’m excited to spend the holidays with my family (after being in India the last 2 winters). I can’t wait to go to Costa Rica, and then hopefully India too.
But 10 months is so long to be away from home, from a place that had been home for only such a short time. While I am so excited about the future, it’s still so hard to let go of the now. Why can’t I have it all?
The song playing on my computer right now is “What do I know of Holy” by Addison Road. “…I guess I thought that I had figured You out, I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about how You were mighty to save, those were only empty words on a page, then I caught a glimpse of who You might be, The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees, What do I know of You, who spoke me into motion? …What do I know of Holy? What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame? And a Man who gave life "its" name? What do I know of Holy? Of the One who the angels praise? All creation knows Your name on earth and heaven above, What do I know of this love?”
I think, what do I know of Holy? Of life? Of eternity? Of the Father who holds the world His hands? The Father who loves me. I can trust Him and rest secure in the knowledge that He knows what’s best for me, and my friends, and He has great plans for all of us. I have only a glimpse of who we are becoming, and only the Father knows where will be go and what we’ll do in the years to come. I can't wait for see what that is.
Though I may not see these friends for a while, or maybe our paths will never cross on earth, I know I’ll see them again in a place called “Holy” and it's going to be great!
Between now and then, I’ll meet new friends. More people to love...and to miss when it comes time to say “good bye.” I’d rather cry when I say “bye” and know I’ll miss them, then to regret that I never got really to know them in the first place.
While it's hard now, to not go to India with the team, I know that spending time getting to know them and growing with them for the last 3 months, only to say "good bye", is worth it…
But this break is harder than in past years, because though most everyone is coming back, it’ll only be for a few days, then they’ll leave for India, and I’ll still be here. Of course then I’m leaving too – to go visit family, do a school in Costa Rica, and then an outreach in India. I won’t be back till September. That’s so far way.
So today I said “bye” to 3 of my friends. 1 who did lecture phase, but isn’t coming back for outreach. The other 2 are going to Utah to staff the D-school there, so I will probably see them again…in October.
Still my heart is heavy thinking of the more good-byes to come as the team leaves for India in just 2 weeks. I’ve known all along that I’m not going with them. I am confident that I’m doing what the Father wants me to do. I’m excited to spend the holidays with my family (after being in India the last 2 winters). I can’t wait to go to Costa Rica, and then hopefully India too.But 10 months is so long to be away from home, from a place that had been home for only such a short time. While I am so excited about the future, it’s still so hard to let go of the now. Why can’t I have it all?
The song playing on my computer right now is “What do I know of Holy” by Addison Road. “…I guess I thought that I had figured You out, I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about how You were mighty to save, those were only empty words on a page, then I caught a glimpse of who You might be, The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees, What do I know of You, who spoke me into motion? …What do I know of Holy? What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame? And a Man who gave life "its" name? What do I know of Holy? Of the One who the angels praise? All creation knows Your name on earth and heaven above, What do I know of this love?”
I think, what do I know of Holy? Of life? Of eternity? Of the Father who holds the world His hands? The Father who loves me. I can trust Him and rest secure in the knowledge that He knows what’s best for me, and my friends, and He has great plans for all of us. I have only a glimpse of who we are becoming, and only the Father knows where will be go and what we’ll do in the years to come. I can't wait for see what that is.
Though I may not see these friends for a while, or maybe our paths will never cross on earth, I know I’ll see them again in a place called “Holy” and it's going to be great!
Between now and then, I’ll meet new friends. More people to love...and to miss when it comes time to say “good bye.” I’d rather cry when I say “bye” and know I’ll miss them, then to regret that I never got really to know them in the first place.
While it's hard now, to not go to India with the team, I know that spending time getting to know them and growing with them for the last 3 months, only to say "good bye", is worth it…
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