I'm Not Who I Was

You've probably heard the song that says, "I wish you could see me now. I wish I could show you how, I'm not who I was"(by Brandon Heath).

When I heard that song a year ago, it was rather depressing. You see 2 years ago I was happy and life was good. Then all that changed...and that's another story that I wrote before and don't feel like re-writing again. So a year ago I saw who I was becoming and that I wasn't who I used to be. It wasn't a good change. I saw myself becoming angry, cold, bitter. It was scary.

Then I look back at the past 10 months, since I came to Idaho.  The Father brought me to the place of forgiveness and giving it to Him. I didn't want to forgive, but I knew I needed to let go of all the pain that I was carrying around. It was a freeing choice, because now I have so much more joy and peace. I am not who I was and it's a good change. Life is good.

The past year hasn't been easy. However, I have gone through the hard times as a different person than I was a year ago. I have been able to keep giving it to the Father. I know that He is always with me and I can trust Him to work all things for good. I'm still far from perfect, but I am learning, and I am really thankful that I am not who I was...